One common mistake I have made since going back to work is starting a load of laundry and forgetting about it. Then you have that awful smell that no matter how many times you wash it, it just stinks! I have washed things over and over, in extra hot water, extra good smelling detergent, everything I can think of but I just can't lose the smell.
I am often like that with Jesus. I sin terribly and I try everything in my power to atone for itm but I am still dirty and smelly. It is like David and his mourning over Absalom. David was trying everything in his power to atone for his sin. 2 Samuel 19 tells us that the soldiers were actually ashamed of their victory because it brought such sorrow to their king. David refused to be comforted. Why? Because he was atoning for his sins. It took the blunt speech of Joab to show the king how selfish he was. "I see, said Joab, that you would be pleased if Absalom were alive today and all of us were dead." (2 Samuel 19:6). David's abnormal grief had so isolated him from reality that he was unable to live like a king and rule over himself and his people. David was smelly all around.
The sorrows of life do not create problems; they reveal them. Absolom's death and David's unnatural mourning revealed to the world that David had not been in control of his family and that his own sin had found him out. Instead of trying to atone for his sin, David should have trusted God for the forgiveness he needed. Only Jesus' blood can atone for our sins. He is the only one who can take this smelly person and make me thoroughly clean. That is what David did when he confessed his sin of adultery and God graciously forgave him. Psalm 51:16-17 "For You do not desire sacrifice, or else I would give it; You do not delight in burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and a contrite heart--These, O God, You will not despise." Even though our sorrows may be caused by our sin, as were David's, we can still confess those sins to the Lord, claim His forgiveness, and experience His comfort. And not be smelly anymore. I am off to change my shirt!
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Long Time
I know it has been a long time since I have blogged. A week, I think. I had the after retreat crash! I think I fell into bed every night this week. I am finally feeling normal again. At least, normal for me.
We had a great football game yesterday. Drew was awesome. I am so proud of him. I just have to tell you how hard it is to sit on the sidelines and watch Drew play quarterback. I feel so helpless. It makes me a nervous wreck. I am so happy for him when he does well, I hurt when he messes up. It is just a wonderful/miserable experience.
It is like life. God is the quarterback and that is hard for me. I want to be making the plays and not watching from the sidelines. I am so much of a "doer" it is hard to let God do his thing and I just follow His lead. He wants to control this game of life and so often I "bench" Him and come in as my own quarterback. I know better but I do it day in and day out.
One theme God is hammering me with this year, "Let me be your quarterback!" God is continually showing me that I don't have to be the quarterback. He can run my life so much better. My weakness and unablity allows Him to move. It allows Him to score the touchdown for HIs glory. I pray this week I will just lay it down. I will let Him run the plays in my life and bench myself.
Who are you being? Quarterback or God's support player?
We had a great football game yesterday. Drew was awesome. I am so proud of him. I just have to tell you how hard it is to sit on the sidelines and watch Drew play quarterback. I feel so helpless. It makes me a nervous wreck. I am so happy for him when he does well, I hurt when he messes up. It is just a wonderful/miserable experience.
It is like life. God is the quarterback and that is hard for me. I want to be making the plays and not watching from the sidelines. I am so much of a "doer" it is hard to let God do his thing and I just follow His lead. He wants to control this game of life and so often I "bench" Him and come in as my own quarterback. I know better but I do it day in and day out.
One theme God is hammering me with this year, "Let me be your quarterback!" God is continually showing me that I don't have to be the quarterback. He can run my life so much better. My weakness and unablity allows Him to move. It allows Him to score the touchdown for HIs glory. I pray this week I will just lay it down. I will let Him run the plays in my life and bench myself.
Who are you being? Quarterback or God's support player?
Monday, September 15, 2008
Update!
Hello friends!
I got home last night from the women's retreat. I was so tired. It was a good tired. We worked hard all weekend and God showed up in spite of us. That is all we ask. That God moved in the hearts of the ladies. It is so different to be teaching a retreat and going to a retreat. God was faithful to me in so many more ways. I wasn't so nervous that it was miserable, glory to God. I could sound out most of the words I had to say! Glory be! God took all my long notes and prayerfully, I said only what He wanted me too. Most of all, I pray that ladies were blessed and God spoke to them through me, in spite of me.
God is so faithful. I am amazed at his love and grace for us. How undeserving we are yet, He continues to show up and move among us. I am so thankful that it doesn't depend on me. I am learning so much about Him in my new job. Most important, how to relinquish much control. I just don't have the time to control somethings. It is amazing how much I didn't rely on the Lord before.
I am so blessed that He is showing me all these things! He is so good. Please, tell me what He is showing you. What are you learning new about Him this week? What is He speaking into your heart about?
I got home last night from the women's retreat. I was so tired. It was a good tired. We worked hard all weekend and God showed up in spite of us. That is all we ask. That God moved in the hearts of the ladies. It is so different to be teaching a retreat and going to a retreat. God was faithful to me in so many more ways. I wasn't so nervous that it was miserable, glory to God. I could sound out most of the words I had to say! Glory be! God took all my long notes and prayerfully, I said only what He wanted me too. Most of all, I pray that ladies were blessed and God spoke to them through me, in spite of me.
God is so faithful. I am amazed at his love and grace for us. How undeserving we are yet, He continues to show up and move among us. I am so thankful that it doesn't depend on me. I am learning so much about Him in my new job. Most important, how to relinquish much control. I just don't have the time to control somethings. It is amazing how much I didn't rely on the Lord before.
I am so blessed that He is showing me all these things! He is so good. Please, tell me what He is showing you. What are you learning new about Him this week? What is He speaking into your heart about?
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Brad's CD News
September 9, 2008
The new cd is getting close to being finished. The final mixes are being done this week and the mastering probably will be done over the weekend. I hope to have it in hand by early October.
It’s going to be called Songs For The Storm. When I was praying about what to do next musically, I really had a peace about this album. It’s going to have four songs on it. Some of the songs have been sitting on the shelf for almost eight years, but now they are finally getting their voice.
I am excited to say that Matthew Fallentine was the producer, as he was on the Unseen album, Blessed Goodbye. This was a different kind of album for us. These songs have a very special place in my heart. Each one has a unique meaning to me. Check out the testimony and songs links above for more about that. This website is really to enhance the songs and give some background to the lyrics. I pray they will be a blessing and that they’ll echo the testimony of God’s faithfulness.
The cd cover is getting final touches as well, but the rough copy is to the left. My friend, Bryan Cole is helping me out with the design, as he did on the Unseen album. He’s great! Look for his links on the cd cover sleeve.
I got to listen to some of the mixes today and I honestly got chill bumps. I had some extra people singing on it as well. Listen for a girl named Bekah Ham and a friend named Richie Fike on another. Look for their information as well on the cd sleeve.
Look around and I pray you’ll be blessed.
Visit bradewing.com for all the info and details.
The new cd is getting close to being finished. The final mixes are being done this week and the mastering probably will be done over the weekend. I hope to have it in hand by early October.
It’s going to be called Songs For The Storm. When I was praying about what to do next musically, I really had a peace about this album. It’s going to have four songs on it. Some of the songs have been sitting on the shelf for almost eight years, but now they are finally getting their voice.
I am excited to say that Matthew Fallentine was the producer, as he was on the Unseen album, Blessed Goodbye. This was a different kind of album for us. These songs have a very special place in my heart. Each one has a unique meaning to me. Check out the testimony and songs links above for more about that. This website is really to enhance the songs and give some background to the lyrics. I pray they will be a blessing and that they’ll echo the testimony of God’s faithfulness.
The cd cover is getting final touches as well, but the rough copy is to the left. My friend, Bryan Cole is helping me out with the design, as he did on the Unseen album. He’s great! Look for his links on the cd cover sleeve.
I got to listen to some of the mixes today and I honestly got chill bumps. I had some extra people singing on it as well. Listen for a girl named Bekah Ham and a friend named Richie Fike on another. Look for their information as well on the cd sleeve.
Look around and I pray you’ll be blessed.
Visit bradewing.com for all the info and details.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Happy Birthday Jake
Today is Jake's birthday. He would have turned 9 today. I just can't believe that it has been that long since Jake went to heaven and that I would have a nine year old boy. I just wonder what our house would be like with him. I am sure it would be just a bit louder and wilder than it is now.
Life can change so quickly, enjoy those you have around you! Don't waste a minute!
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Psalm 32
Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.
For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord”— and you forgave the guilt of my sin. Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found; surely when the mighty waters rise they will not reach him. You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you. Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you. Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him. Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart.
Just meditate on this today!
Blessed means happy.
Happy is the man whose . . .
Be Happy TODAY!
For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord”— and you forgave the guilt of my sin. Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found; surely when the mighty waters rise they will not reach him. You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you. Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you. Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him. Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart.
Just meditate on this today!
Blessed means happy.
Happy is the man whose . . .
Be Happy TODAY!
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
The Bug Returns!
The stomach bug returns to The Ewing house. Drew came home from school with a fever and not feeling well. He didn't feel good at school and called his dad to come and get him. Dad told him to "suck it up" and he stayed at school. In Brad's defense, he did not have a fever at that point but you know how dads are. Mom probably would have gone and gotten him but that is a whole new post on the difference between how dad and mom do things differently.
So, while we were sitting at dinner, Drew jumped off the couch and started running towards the toilet. He didn't make it. He threw up right next to the kitchen table where we were all eating. That is a great way to ruin your appetite. The stomach bug rears its ugly head again in the Ewing house.
I am so reminded of how much I just want to take care of my kids when they are sick and in need. They are so fragile and so needy - very rare with a pre-teen. But how good it feels when they want you to just take care of them. I miss that with the older one.
How much more does God want to just hold us and take care of us. Yet we think we are "grown-up" christians and don't need His tender loving care. I am studying Hosea for retreat and one main point I keep coming to is how God wants to love us as a husband and not just as our Lord. I don't struggle as much with the Lord aspect. I am pretty good with "yes sirs." It is the close intimate love I struggle with. I remember distinctly one time I was asking the Lord questions - should I do this? Can I do that? Is it ok for me to do . . . .? I felt like He said in my heart, why don't you just talk to me? Tell me how you are doing, let me love on you. Don't just come to me for permission, talk to me, spend time just getting to know me. The Ultimate Relationship. Let's all take the time to let Him minister to our hearts, to fill our empty places with Him, and to enjoy time in His Presence.
So, while we were sitting at dinner, Drew jumped off the couch and started running towards the toilet. He didn't make it. He threw up right next to the kitchen table where we were all eating. That is a great way to ruin your appetite. The stomach bug rears its ugly head again in the Ewing house.
I am so reminded of how much I just want to take care of my kids when they are sick and in need. They are so fragile and so needy - very rare with a pre-teen. But how good it feels when they want you to just take care of them. I miss that with the older one.
How much more does God want to just hold us and take care of us. Yet we think we are "grown-up" christians and don't need His tender loving care. I am studying Hosea for retreat and one main point I keep coming to is how God wants to love us as a husband and not just as our Lord. I don't struggle as much with the Lord aspect. I am pretty good with "yes sirs." It is the close intimate love I struggle with. I remember distinctly one time I was asking the Lord questions - should I do this? Can I do that? Is it ok for me to do . . . .? I felt like He said in my heart, why don't you just talk to me? Tell me how you are doing, let me love on you. Don't just come to me for permission, talk to me, spend time just getting to know me. The Ultimate Relationship. Let's all take the time to let Him minister to our hearts, to fill our empty places with Him, and to enjoy time in His Presence.
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